Sudden nerves

Aside from feeling like I can't get enough sleep and lack of desire for my normal food habits (fruit = zero appeal, but ice cream and brownies = can't get enough!), I've been feeling pretty normal.  Emotionally optimistic and not too concerned about the current absence of obvious pregnancy symptoms.  Occasionally I think I might feel nauseated for about a second, but nothing ever materializes.

Then this morning I got an email from my nurse that my first ultrasound will be in 2 days.  Suddenly, I feel nervous and unsure.  I know everything will be fine, and there is nothing to worry about, but there's always that little shadow of doubt in the back of my head.

I'm looking forward to some reassurance that everything is going well!  Hopes and prayers for rising hCGs and a visible heartbeat!  Keep an eye out for video on Thursday!

Week 5

My doctor has been out of town for the last week or so.  I am expecting a call from the nurse tomorrow to schedule our first ultrasound.  It might be too early to see a heartbeat, but hoping to get a good report on the gestational sac and confirmation that things are progressing well. 

I'm anxiously awaiting an onrush of pregnancy symptoms.  Last time around, I felt very "unpregnant."  No nausea, no fatigue.  I just really want to feel it this time!  I have been napping daily, which is very much out of character.  Also felt slight nausea after going to bed last night, but I'm chalking it up to a day full of junk food.  :-)

Time sure is crawling...

Little sacrifices

Tomorrow we leave for a weekend trip to the river with Brandon, Lindy, and their new boat. FUN, right?

WRONG! Call from the nurse today says no boating fun for me. Until week 10 (at least) no activities that may put pressure on my abdomen. The bouncing of the boat while speeding along is no bueno for my little embryo.

BUT...I will still be on vacation and intend to enjoy it fully in the comfort of our rental or out by the pool. Sad that I will likely be alone most of the time, but glad Nate will be able to get away and enjoy himself for a few days!

Thinking I might pick up that needlepoint I started in Africa 3 years ago. That will definitely provide hours of frustration...er, entertainment. :-D

Moving along...

Good news yesterday!  I had my second hCG test to confirm that the pregnancy is progressing as it should.  As a general rule, hCG numbers should double every 48-72 hours.  From Friday to Monday, my hCG numbers nearly tripled!  We're feeling very happy and relieved and just continuing to pray that things move in the right direction.

Off to the river this weekend for some fun and relaxation!

Miracles do happen!

The last month has been quite a whirlwind.  Since I went on injectables on June 5th, there has been much frustration.  My body still was not responding to the medication and the doctor didn't seem too happy with the results.  I had 4 total follicles, but only one that was growing.  This brought our chances for success down to a measly 7%.  My doctor even suggested that we skip any further IUI treatments and go straight to IVF (about $10,000 a pop with only 65% success rate).  I felt so discouraged that I questioned whether completing this IUI cycle was even worth the effort.

Nate and I discussed our options and decided that we needed a break from the stress and emotions that come along with infertility.  If this cycle doesn't work, we'll go back to trying on our own.

My one follicle eventually reached a viable size, and we induced ovulation on the 11th. 

I started charting my temperatures again in hopes that I would know sooner if implantation did or didn't take place.  Everything was looking good.  I saw the ovulation dip indicating the trigger worked.  We had two back-to-back IUIs on the 12th and 13th.  My temperatures were up and staying high.  Every day that passed increased my hope just a little bit.

I had a blood test scheduled for the 27th.  Two days prior, my temperature dropped more than an full degree.  This could indicate one of two things: an "implantation dip" in which your temp drops for one day, or my period was on its way.  I immediately lost hope and gave in that this wasn't our month.

The next morning, I woke up at 5:45am to take my temperature.  I never expected to see it shoot back up to its pre-dip measurement!  Of course, over the next few hours I took multiple pregnancy tests.  I was getting a very faint positive line, but didn't want to get my hopes up.  On Friday the 27th, I took a digital test and it read "pregnant"!  I still don't think it's sunk in.

My blood test at the doctor's office confirmed and showed hCG levels of 70, which is right in line with where I should be, 4 weeks along.  I'm scheduled for another test on Monday to confirm that the numbers are increasing and the pregnancy is progressing as it should.

I'm still pretty nervous.  We're only halfway to where we were when I had my miscarriage and we are far from out of the woods.  We are hoping and praying that this one "sticks"!  Can't wait till October when we can finally make the announcement to all the ones we love!

My husband, the doctor

Went in for an ultrasound two days ago. 

What I wanted to hear: "Everything looks GREAT!  Come back in two days and we'll get this party started (aka get on with IUI #1)!!"

What I actually heard:  "Your follicles aren't growing.  Come back in two days."

Wah-wah (insert sad trombone here).

Fast-forward to today.

What I wanted to hear:  "Everything looks GREAT!  Come back in two days and we'll get this party started!!"

What I actually heard:  "Your follicles aren't growing.  Here's some syringes and medication.  You'll have to inject yourself at home."

Now, I'm by no means afraid of needles, but injecting myself is not at the top of my bucket list.  Fortunately, I enlisted my husband (who loves me dearly, by the way) and he stuck me like a pro.  Thanks, Babe!

***The above conversations have been summarized for dramatic effect.***

We interrupt the regular scheduled programming...

When I wrote my last post on January 31st, my hope was that the next one would be the happy announcement that we were once again pregnant.  But somewhere around April the Baby Express took an unexpected detour down Fertility Boulevard, encountering crossroads like Emotional Avenue, Injection Highway, and the junction of Hurry-up and Wait!

To sum up the last six months:  We tried; we failed; we called the doc.

So here we are at the beginning of a new chapter in this adventure; one we never thought we would be on.  One with bumpy roads, uncertainty, and no guarantees. 

I'm starting a bit late.  We've been through all the testing and found out I have PCOS (which sounds scary when you first hear you have it, but apparently isn't that big a deal...until you want babies); and, well, basically nothing else is wrong with either of us.  Comforting, right?

So here we are amidst our first IUI cycle.  It's pretty frustrating because things don't seem to be moving along like we'd like them to.  But for now we're just hanging in there hoping, with each appointment, for good news.