I am so thankful that the first six and a half months of my pregnancy was (dare I say) easy and without incident! I remember praying for morning sickness that never came and, eventually, feeling grateful for not having to experience that. I never had spotting. Occasional brief seconds of stabbing pain due to my insides making room for Emma; a little fatigue; but none of the extreme inconveniences I imagined carrying a baby would bring.
And then month seven rolled around. I mentioned in my last post about the numbness in my heels that I have been experiencing for about a month. Thankfully, my 3-hour glucose test came back normal, and gestational diabetes is not the cause! Yay for that, but my feet become achier every day. I feel the stretching in my heels every time I stand up. My feet swell up at least once a day. Elevation helps, but I can't exactly walk around with my feet up in the air. Nate has been wonderful with nightly foot massages, but the relief is temporary.
Insomnia has set in. Having started back to work last week after having the summer off, I was looking forward to having a routine again and getting lots of rest before Emma's arrival. No such luck. Can't sleep through the night. And I'm not talking about waking up to pee...I'm talking wide awake from midnight to 4:00am. Nightly. Really, Mr. Sandman??? You couldn't let me enjoy my last two months before mandatory midnight feedings and diaper changes begin??
My clothes don't fit. No, not the size 6s that I was wearing last year (those days were over about 2.5 seconds after our little "Bubbles" made her presence known); but the maternity clothes that are supposed to "grow with you," they're tight. I'm uncomfortable. My feet don't fit in my shoes, and when they do, I need somebody else to tie them for me. Bending over sucks. The 4.5 miles I walk with Lexi every day that used to take 45 minutes now takes an hour and a half.
BUT...Miss Emma is more active than ever; I can actually see my tummy ripple as she kicks and squirms. And that makes it worth it. I have a little baby growing inside of me that made it past 8 weeks. And that makes it worth it. In two months, I'm going to be snuggling my daughter in my arms. And that makes it worth it. The love I feel in my heart is going to grow exponentially...and that, my friends, makes it all worth it.
It's hard sometimes to appreciate the challenges, but without them, we wouldn't appreciate the blessings. So today I'm going to be thankful that I have feet in which to feel pain, a bed in which I can lie awake at night, and too-small clothes that reaffirm a life is growing inside of me.
Sunday, September 29, 2013
Saturday, September 21, 2013
All grown up
This week, Nate and I both celebrated another year of birthdays with a little bit of pampering and relaxation. Our last vacation before Emma arrives.
While we both enjoyed the weekend and the blessings of gifts, phone calls, cards, and Facebook messages from loved ones, we also had an epiphany of how different birthdays have become. Rather than the excitement and anticipation of presents and parties, it's about the passing of time and the reminder of responsibility that comes with being a grown-up.
It sounds depressing, but it's actually why I'm that much more excited for Emma to join us. I can't wait for that excitement to be a part of our lives again. Every year we will get to celebrate our long-anticipated gift from God and watch her grow through challenges and accomplishments. I hope we will be reminded how it feels to be carefree and joyous like a child and that we will be able to set our adult responsibilities aside (when appropriate) and enjoy those childhood emotions once again. Every day will take on new meaning as we field questions of curiosity and awe at the world being discovered around her.
That said, our last grown-up getaway as a family of two was just what the doctor ordered. A day of pampering -- massages, mud baths, moisturizing treatments, and mineral spas; drives on two-lane country roads; a flock of wild turkeys; mountain views; and apple pie. We didn't stop to take too many pictures -- which, one day, I may regret -- but it was nice to just enjoy our time and capture the memories in our minds.
Here are the highlights:
One last note...asking for your prayers this week. Failed my glucose test again last week and going back for the three-hour test on Wednesday. I've been having pain in the heels of my feet for about a month -- possibly tarsal tunnel syndrome, which can be a symptom of gestational diabetes. I am hoping for normal blood-sugar levels on Wednesday. Will keep you posted...
While we both enjoyed the weekend and the blessings of gifts, phone calls, cards, and Facebook messages from loved ones, we also had an epiphany of how different birthdays have become. Rather than the excitement and anticipation of presents and parties, it's about the passing of time and the reminder of responsibility that comes with being a grown-up.
It sounds depressing, but it's actually why I'm that much more excited for Emma to join us. I can't wait for that excitement to be a part of our lives again. Every year we will get to celebrate our long-anticipated gift from God and watch her grow through challenges and accomplishments. I hope we will be reminded how it feels to be carefree and joyous like a child and that we will be able to set our adult responsibilities aside (when appropriate) and enjoy those childhood emotions once again. Every day will take on new meaning as we field questions of curiosity and awe at the world being discovered around her.
That said, our last grown-up getaway as a family of two was just what the doctor ordered. A day of pampering -- massages, mud baths, moisturizing treatments, and mineral spas; drives on two-lane country roads; a flock of wild turkeys; mountain views; and apple pie. We didn't stop to take too many pictures -- which, one day, I may regret -- but it was nice to just enjoy our time and capture the memories in our minds.
Here are the highlights:
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| Nate started his morning with a healthy breakfast and a Bloody Mary. Yum! |
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| Overlooking the vista in a hot, relaxing jacuzzi. |
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| No spas for me, but the saltwater pool was the perfect hangout! |
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| Our first time to Julian, CA, for some famous apple pie... |
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| ...and yummy apple walnut pancakes... |
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| ...and home style potatoes and omelet. |
Friday, September 13, 2013
A Friday funny
I just realized how inappropriate it is to walk into Costco at 7 months pregnant and buy nothing but a case of beer. But that is how much I love my baby daddy.
Can't wait till after delivery when I get to send him to the store for extra long, super absorbent overnight maxis with wings. Ha!
TMI? Sorry, couldn't help myself. Happy weekend, everyone!
Friday, September 6, 2013
Everything will be okay...right???
I fear the panic of all the unknowns is setting in. Another wonderful side effect of no summer job and ample time to sit at home with my thoughts.
In about three months, our lives are going to change drastically. I can't begin to describe how much we're looking forward to the joy, excitement, and love that Emma Lynn is going to add to our lives, but those feelings of doubt and worry are starting to seep in through the cracks.
We're having a baby. Our future holds sleepless nights, dirty diapers, throw up, and, chances are, two very tired and cranky parents. How can they possibly entrust two naive, untrained, flawed human beings with the survival and well-being of an innocent, helpless infant?! What are they thinking??? (And who are they, by the way?) :-)
In the midst of my perfect timing, I have accepted a new job. The great part is it will allow me to work from home. The not-so-great part, the hours start small, and the nights start long. I'll be working three part-time jobs come next year, and still not sure that will be enough. How will we provide for another mouth to feed? How will I do at balancing work and family and making sure that Nate and Emma get everything they need from me while still helping support the family?
I don't know the answers to any of these questions and it's scary. But we've made it through tough times before and human beings are quite resilient. I'm hoping these thoughts are all coming from my overly dramatic subconscious and are not a foreshadowing of what's to come. Where there's a will, there's a way; right? Right!
In about three months, our lives are going to change drastically. I can't begin to describe how much we're looking forward to the joy, excitement, and love that Emma Lynn is going to add to our lives, but those feelings of doubt and worry are starting to seep in through the cracks.
We're having a baby. Our future holds sleepless nights, dirty diapers, throw up, and, chances are, two very tired and cranky parents. How can they possibly entrust two naive, untrained, flawed human beings with the survival and well-being of an innocent, helpless infant?! What are they thinking??? (And who are they, by the way?) :-)
In the midst of my perfect timing, I have accepted a new job. The great part is it will allow me to work from home. The not-so-great part, the hours start small, and the nights start long. I'll be working three part-time jobs come next year, and still not sure that will be enough. How will we provide for another mouth to feed? How will I do at balancing work and family and making sure that Nate and Emma get everything they need from me while still helping support the family?
I don't know the answers to any of these questions and it's scary. But we've made it through tough times before and human beings are quite resilient. I'm hoping these thoughts are all coming from my overly dramatic subconscious and are not a foreshadowing of what's to come. Where there's a will, there's a way; right? Right!
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